Calling People Up or Calling Them Out?

Why we think both can be effective...

“You are so creative!”

That’s what my 2nd grade teacher said to me.

I had just taken a test that challenged us to turn a big abstract blob printed on a piece of paper, into a picture and write a story about it.

I think I made my blob a painter’s palette. I THINK. Don’t ask me how I remember that. I think I just felt really proud.

When my teacher told me I was creative, I was 7 years old and still a flight risk to wet the bed at sleepovers. But, looking back, it may have been an inflection point of my life. 

In the years to follow, I remembered what she said, but it’s only been in the last 5 or so that I’ve wondered….

Was I actually creative when she told me that? Or am I creative now because she told me that?

I’m not sure that we’ll ever know.

What I do know is, because of that one comment, I try to make similar ones.

Just in case it’s the latter.

You can change the trajectory of someone’s life by complimenting them, not only on things that we see, but things that we don’t see quite yet. Things that we believe they’re capable of. 

If I was the first blob turned painter’s palette ever and Ms. Martin really was impressed with my creativity, I’m glad she called it out.

But, for all I know, she had a stack-full of blobs turned painter’s palettes sitting on her desk. If that’s the case, I’m called she called me up.

This theory is being put to the test for the world to see in Netflix’s newest docuseries, Unlocked: A Jail Experiment. 

The gist? An Arkansas Sheriff believes that if his jail has more autonomy and less control, it can lead to a more community-oriented living environment and fewer people continuing to break the law after serving their sentences. 

He wants to unlock the cell doors and give his inmates the ability to come and go in the unit, thinking that if they’re treated like respectable humans, they’ll behave like respectable humans.

He says that the men in his jail are not defined by the reasons they’re in there. He knows that they can be contributing citizens when they’re released.

He’s calling these men up.

The show is sparking differing opinions, some outraged at the “reckless” nature of the experiment, others love that it gives these men an opportunity to work towards something productive and make them less likely to find their way back to jail after they’re released.

Everyone who watches has their own opinion, and that’s a lot of opinions since the show held the #1 spot all weekend long. 

After watching only 1 episode, I don’t know enough to pick a side.

What I do know is that I was, at the very least, inspired by Sheriff Higgins’ innovation and drive to change the culture of his Arkansas jail. 

He said to his inmates, “prove to me that I’m right about you.”

I don’t know what happens in Unlocked after the first episode, but I hope they prove to the Sheriff that he’s right about them.

I can’t help but think that a portion of my life is proving to Ms. Martin that she was right about me.

Xo, The Salesgirls

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